Well I have a new plan. I have tried to be paleo and just don't have the will power. I am very convinced that it is the optimal way to eat, I just struggle sticking to it. For now I am just trying to get in the slow process of making better eating decisions. Of realizing there are better substitutions for the foods that are loaded with calories, and that all these mind games and incentives just make me go crazy. So when I have a sweet tooth I'll have a ton of fruit or some hard candy or popcorn, or eat what i want. The hope is that I eventually will be like my wife who eats what she wants but doesn't go crazy on it. She doesn't think, "well if I am going to cheat I am going to go all the way since this may be the last time in 3 months I have a donut, so I am going to eat a bunch and be disappointed because they didn't have the flavor i wanted, and so let's go back tomorrow." If I decrease the amount of calories I eat I'll lose weight. So I just need to work on filling up with the good stuff, and find better ways to satiate my terrible cravings.
By the way I have found the weightloss quaker Oats to be a very satisfying desert for me. I love it.